This is probably the only “serious” blog entry I will ever write.My daughter is having her first experience with a bully and unfortunately she is only in Kindergarten. I thought I at least had a few years before we would even be discussing this concept, but noooooo…..a six year old is having to hear about when to walk away and when to defend herself.
When I first starting hearing the term “bully”, I thought back to when I was a kid and I remembered a certain girl (or evil bitch as I like to think of her) who was by all definitions, a full-fledged bully in the second grade. Everyone was afraid of her. She was mean, picked on everyone and never followed the rules. One day we were in class waiting in line to go to the auditorium and she began to pinch me on the arm. After the second time, I said to her “if you do that one more time, I am going to punch you”. Well she did, and then I did….right in the face. We were both taken to the office however, I did not get into trouble when I explained what happened. The best part that came out of this is that she never bothered me again. I stood up for myself and she did not expect that from a skinny little white girl. But that is not at all how things happen today.
I hear stories on the news and read about them more often than I would like to, about kids who attempt or succeed in committing suicide all because they were being bullied. What are we as parents doing to STOP this? Do we teach our kids to be kind to others? Do we remind our kids that everyone is different and that it does not make any one person better than another? Do we know what our kids are acting like when they are at school or who they are hanging around? I know for us, we teach our daughter to always be kind, which in this case is only making it worse.
I have a lot of thoughts on what is causing this trend, most of it boiling down to access to more forums to spread rumors and hatred. What a waste when it could be used for so much more. It seems technology has a serious downside and often our children are paying the price.
The other huge culprit is the economy and parents now being forced to work harder, which leaves less time spent with our children. Our kids are suffering far more from this down turn then most of us realize. So maybe they are acting out for attention. Maybe they are figuring that some attention is better than no attention.
The other part of the economy besides the lack of time is that a lot of families cannot afford to buy the best clothes and toys anymore. We know how cruel kids can be when one child does not have the things that many other kids have. They are teased and made fun of for something that is out of their control.
The bottom line is that we as parents need to take responsibility for our children. Spend time with them when we can, listen when they speak and step in when our children are in trouble. We cannot always rely on the school system or others to see what may be happening. It is not the school’s fault, however. One teacher has 15 or more students to watch and could not possibly see everything that happens. Now, I know that kids can make mountains out of mole hills and tend to exaggerate about most everything, but we owe it to our children to believe them and check it out when they say there is a problem.
WAKE UP PEOPLE…..you chose to become a parent, now start acting like one! (for those of you who didn’t choose to become a parent, you chose to have sex, so you chose parenthood by default)
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